The X-Factor
It seems I get the drunkest when I don’t plan on it. If I plan, say on Monday, that on Friday I am going to drink myself stupid, something usually comes up that prevents that from happening. It can be anything. Maybe I stubbed my toe, so I’m in a bad mood. Maybe I’ve pumped up the event too much in my head, so I am disappointed by it. But when I don’t plan on drinking ad nauseam is when I end up getting the most wasted. And for the few times where I get supper hammered, there also has to be the X-factor.
The X-factor is a wily beast. It is a rare phenomenon that just makes you drink, you feel compelled to drink, you become very sociable, and suddenly able to handle your alcohol very well – until you reach a certain level, at which point you just fall apart. The first X-factor that I remember was when I was in a minor car accident. I was really pissed off because of it and so I went out drinking that night and I got absolutely tanked. But, it was exactly what I needed to relieve the stress of the day, and even though I was hungover the next day, it was worth it.
This past weekend, I had another X-factor. On Friday I had a second job interview, and I thought it went pretty well. I just want to be clear, it’s not that I hate my job now, or that I don’t like it even, but it is so unrewarding, coupled with the fact that I spend on average 11 hours each week commuting and I need a change of scenery. This new job would be walking distance from my adobe; I would save a ton of money on gas, tolls, and parking (about $130 a month in gas, $50 in tolls, and $25 for parking). Additionally, instead of leaving at 7 in the morning and getting home at 6, I could leave at 8 and get home at 5. Even if this new job paid the same exact salary as my current job, it would be like I was making an additional $2500 a year just because of my reduced commute. And, I’m pretty sure the new job pays about $12,000 more than what I currently make. I could think of quite a few things to do with an extra grand a month.
So, like I said, I was in a great mood because of this job interview that seemed to go well. I had the interview in the morning and went into work late. That evening my work had another company sponsored happy hour. The happy hour lasted from 5:30 until 7. We showed up at 5 and we got a drink at the bar because we didn’t want to wait 30 minutes to get a drink. Luckily, they opened up the free bar to us at 5:15. Between 5:30 and 7 I had no less than 9 drinks. For those keeping track at home, that’s a quicker pace than a power hour, and I was going at that pace for an hour and a half. I started with Amstel Light, and then I quickly switched over to rum and cokes when I realized that I could drink more alcohol in less time with the mixed drink.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I planned to get drunk, but not this drunk. I was originally planning on driving home after the happy hour. This was now clearly out of the question – I at least had that much sense of mind. However, one of my good friends called me up and said he was coming to a nearby bar. This would work out perfectly because happy hour had just ended. I rounded up a few of my friends from the company happy hour and we staggered over to Rhino Bar.
Rhino Bar is apparently the DC home for the Red Sox. They had the game on every TV. Now, I’m not a particularly big fan of the Red Sox, in fact, they are my second least favorite team (my first least favorite team being the Yankees, which usually gets me some love from the Sox fans), but I am a fan of drink specials. So when I went to the bar and asked for a pitcher, and the bartender told me it would be $5, I was pretty excited. We stayed for a couple of pitchers before we decided we should head to Clarendon Ballroom.
We drove there somehow (oh, probably because not everybody there was as wasted as me) and we got there a little bit early. They were charging a cover because there was a band that night. I honestly can’t remember if I paid the cover or not – things get a little hazy at this point. For example, the next day I woke up with a ringing in my ear, my shirt, my sunglasses, and my watch were missing. When I first woke up I didn’t realize why my ears were ringing. It took me a couple of hours to realize that it was because there was a band the previous night. My articles were missing because I apparently stopped off at somebody’s place and partially disrobed before finally making it back to my place for the night.
There are only three memories that I have from the Ballroom. (1) There was a band. I don’t remember how good this band was, I just know they were a cover band, so they were probably just like every other cover band ever. (2) I handed my credit card to Chris and told him to get drinks. I don’t remember if I ever got a drink out of this deal, or why I offered my card. I don’t know how many drinks he put on my card, I only know that I got my card back. It’s possible that this never actually happened and I just made it up. And (3) I made out with a girl that may or may not have been completely random on the dance floor.
Unfortunately, I did not bring my camera because I didn’t think I’d be going out directly from happy hour to heavy drinking, so I don’t have pictures to corroborate my story. That is why I take as many pictures as I do, so that I can remember nights such as this. Next time I will be more diligent in my picture taking duties.
The problem with this particular X-factor is that it prevented me from more good times on Saturday night, for which I already had plans to get wasted. That part will come soon enough, because, if nothing else, some great quotes came out of it.
Other posts by Justin
June 5th, 2007 at 10:01 am
[…] I was recently told that I had invited myself down to a girl’s room, and after she accepted my invitation, I told her, “I will be down in a fifth of a third of a second. Bet you can’t time that, but I can.” The sad thing was that I apparently explained to her the way in which one could time such an event, but she, for whatever reason, could not grasp the extreme knowledge that I had dropped on her. And since I don’t even remember uttering those words, I have no clue how one would go about measuring out six hundredths of a second. But alas, like the city of Atlantis, it is lost forever. […]
June 19th, 2007 at 8:35 am
[…] By this point I am drunk, but not wasted, although you wouldn’t be able to tell by my demeanor. You see, there was another X-Factor involved tonight – I had just got offered that new job. Yup, it was going to be one of those types of nights. […]