The Drunken Blog

Like so many others out there, I have this constant nagging fear that I will not succeed in this world. You just sort of assume that things will work out, but in the back of your head you have that gnawing suspicion that “working out” is actually you dawning one of the free blankets that are given out to the societaly inept, dysfunctionaly homely, workily challenged, or as you may know them, the homeless guys in the street.

Of course, I don’t fear that will actually happen, I can always get a job at Taco Bell, I am perhaps even more qualified than K-fed, because I’m not a douche. And while the living conditions wouldn’t be great if I was working at Taco Bell, I would be living. But that begs the question, what do I need to do to get a job that’s a few income brackets above what I would be making at Taco Bell?

I already possess a few of the qualities necessitated, I believe. I have the innate ability to wear my underwear under my pants, and socially chastise those that wear underwear on the outside of their pants. I have the ability to put words that I am reading together in a way that makes me laugh, no matter what the content of the words, but more importantly, I can look at instructional pictures and extract a meaning that is simply not there. These skills are all very marketable, but without validation, they won’t do me any good.

Well, luckily for me, that validation came very recently. It seems that my mother has been turned onto my blog and she has been reading somewhat irregularly. And not only that, but she has been turning on other family members, and not family members that are directly related - I’ve finally hit the big time! But I digress, the other night my mom called me to catch up some and she filled me in on events and such, and she told me that my blog is great, that I managed to get her to laugh heartily. (Is it just me, or am I using an absurdly large amount of adverbs, some of which aren’t even real words?) Normally I would just think that it was a mom doing her motherly duty, but she assuredly told me that if it wasn’t good, she just wouldn’t have mentioned anything at all and let it fly under the radar, speaking of radars, I think I am going to try to use more palindromes in my writing – hopefully the soosoos know a reviver so the revver of my racecar won’t get deked and wreck the rotor. Clearly my writing is genius, and now I have the official “mom stamp of approval,” so I can move on to bigger and better things (are you listening book publishers?!)

Other posts by Justin

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 7th, 2007 at 8:20 am and is filed under friends . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.